Just dreaming…

Why do we dream?  What is the point?  Is our subconcious just bored?  And how on earth does a dream happen so quickly?  How is it that between smacking that annoying alarm clock snooze button, and it’s repeat alarm 9 minutes later, you can have an entire dream?  I also find it funny how in such a short span of time all remnants of that dream have floated away, like a thin wisp of smoke in a light breeze.  And then during the day something happens that makes parts of it come flooding back. 

*Opens the refrigerator*  “oh my!  Jimmy totally opened the refrigerator in my dream!! How weird is that!?”

I am one of those people that is a very vivid dreamer.  Not like, hey I’m dreaming about my future, kinda dreamer, but a sleep dreamer.    Of course these dreams never make any sense what-so-ever.  Most of the time they have nothing to do with anything!  Lately though, random things from my day-to-day life have been making an appearance and putting on a good show in my dreams.  Some times I wake up crying, sometimes I wake up on the verge of a scream, or sometimes I even wake up due to the fact that I am giggling over something and the sound of my own laughter awakens me.  I pose another question… how do these dreams have the power to move you to verbalize?  Sometimes they even make you to sleep walk! (I am a big sleepwalker, which usually ends up with me waking up in a panic somewhere in my house…)

From crazy locations, to situations that will never come to pass, to eating ice cream on a jet plane, dreams are a strange thing. 

So, readers, what do you think your dreams are about?  Do you find meaning in your dreams?  Solice perhaps?  Or do you view them as a strange happenstance that will hopefully never happen in real life (or maybe, hopefully will!  Who doesn’t want to be able to fly? Come on now! ).

Adventures in Baking

Somedays, I just get that itching feeling.   Like I should be doing something better with my time than plopping down on my couch and laughing over re-runs of Will & Grace.

So last night, I decided to try my hand at baking.  But not just the normal, easy go-to recipe of chocolate chip cookies.  No… I decided to go “fancy” with an apple struesel muffin.  My intentions were good, my heart was pure… and yet… well… the results were less than spectacular!

umm... Yum...

As you can see, I had some issues with the struesel topping itself.  I think I over melted the butter and didn’t compensate with enough flour… so the result was that… ^^^   Don’t they look delish! 

As a first time liver-on-her-owner,  I have been trying out my culinary skills.  After this mess, I phoned my mother and ranted about how nothing in the kitchen ever works right for me.  Generally most of my baking turns out like this!  She gave me some wonderful words of wisdom, “Well, at least you can eat your mistakes!”  Gee, thanks mom!  I call for comfort and you tell me to eat these ugly things?  Of course, it was better than my dad’s advice… “Just put icing on them.”  mmm iced apple struesel muffins? 

Well, I took her words to heart, and plunked the muffins out of their pan, pulling off all the crusty bits as I went (and eating them of course).

Eventually, after prying them out of the pan and removing the crusty bits,  I took the plunge and bit in to one.  I honestly will admit that I was surprised with what I tasted!!  Despite their horrendous appearance, these muffins tasted wonderful!

After the crusty bits were picked off, they looked much... happier...

Though for the next while I think I will be sticking with the good old classics (chocolate chip cookies and banana muffins anyone?), my experiments of the evening took a good turn in the end!  And now I have a bunch of ugly, amazing tasting muffins (that I’m sure no-one else will touch) all to myself!  

Talk about an adventerous evening!

Forever rambling…

This summer I was challenged (more or less so I could get my wonderful College certificate) to get a job in my chosen field of study.  As I sit here at my computer, having done every single task that has been assigned to me, I wonder, is this what I want?

Let me start off by saying that I am fully enjoying my job so far.  Though I still have 2 more months to go until my  internship is finished, hopefully it will keep being this awesome.
Somehow, today, having too much time to think and only having one other person in the office, makes me wonder what it would be like to do this full time and permanently.

So far, during this internship I have been asked to do the most insane tasks.  From wrapping presents, selling alcohol tickets, re-arranging storage rooms and answering phones, my days certainly haven’t been dull.  But it all leaves me wondering, if I were to work this job full time would I be doing the same things?  Am I really getting the most out of my experiences this summer?  Am I really getting the most out of my future??

Taking a few years off between high school and college has allowed me time to travel, see the world, meet new people, and sample some amazing food (and some not so amazing…).  Sitting in a desk for the next 40 something odd years…  well, it seems to be a long, drawn out path.

Is it my newfound taste of freedom that has made my long awaited career seem less desirable, or is it just the fantasies of youth. The fantasy that I could be out saving the world, travelling, making friends, and seeing amazing things with my own two eyes.

Somedays running errands outside of the office seems to be all of the freedom I will get. 

So, as my future stretches out endlessly before my eyes, I have too much spare time to wonder, did I choose the wrong path?  Or once I am set on my way, will there be many little paths to choose from?  The possibilities are limitless, but my vision is so limited.  So off I go, on my little chosen path, praying that everyday will be worth the next 40-something years of my life well wasted!!

Midnight Ramblings of the Socially Retarded…

Midnight Ramblings of the Socially Retarded  (yes, that would be me…)

As I sit in my bed with my laptop, I realize once again, just how lame I can be. My Friday night consisted of baking muffins (which, while good, don’t take the place of a good friend… well… okay, eating has pretty much become my best friend), and my Saturday consisted of folding t-shirts.

Tonight I spent two hours folding shirts, slowly dying a little more inside with each shirt. Much to my dismay (though it happens every time) there is always one person who insists on unfolding two hours worth of work in about 30 seconds. With all the time that I have to think about everything (and I do mean everything) I had concocted a plan. If chubby blonde girl unfolded one more shirt, I would bludgeon her to death with a hanger. With all my spare time I’m sure I could sharpen one to a very nice little boomerang of death or something…

Driving home from work was not eventful (now that my car is back in the shop and not dying in the middle of traffic). At a stop light, however, I happened to glance through a living room window where I saw a young woman stand up, walk across her living room, and give her man a hug. I realized that for one second I had witnessed a perfect moment. Yes, I’m a little bit creepy, but it almost gives you some hope for the world. It also gives me the drive to close my curtains the moment the sun goes down!

I had previously decided that this summer I would be outgoing and make a few new friends. All of my friends disappear for the summer, and when they go, so does my social life. Due to circumstances where I have new-found freedom, not having any friends to share it with kind of depletes the whole, “I am a young adult in the big wide world alone, let’s go do fun stuff” thing. As I attempt to get to know people I get a whole slew of reactions, ranging from crazy looks, to pitiful smiles; to “I know how you feels.” The fact that I am also socially retarded when put into a big group circumstance also doesn’t help my social outlook. With a few people I know, I’m great! Outgoing and fun. But stick me at a table with a pile of people I don’t know, and Houston, we’ve got a problem. Breaking into a herd of young adults is especially difficult. It’s not unlike being the stupid gazelle who wanders into a pack of lions. You get the stare down, the glare down, the “mmm fresh meat,” and finally they either rip you apart or look upon you disdainfully.

I suppose in this life so far I am lacking nothing. I have amazing friends (however far away they may be) a car (that spends more time in the shop than on the road), and an awesome home (which I haven’t managed to burn down by experimenting with my cooking…yet…). There are many things a lone person can do by his/herself. Like, flying a kite! (Tried that on a very windy day, and when the kite is as big as you are, you can be dragged pretty far… try several feet through a field on your face… yes. It did happen.) or knitting! (ha!). Or a lone person can start writing down the strange random things going through their mind at the moment (sound familiar?). I could also use this time to perfect my boomerang hanger of death. Or I could use it to sleep peacefully and bask in the peacefulness until fall when school, work, and finally, a social life, all begin again!

Goodnight world!